Stories from The Buffalo Bill Archives
Stories from The Buffalo Bill Archives
SkiVtLer Marcia "Curiouser and curiouser" Ruklic <email@example.com>
So, what is the real story behind Buffalo Bill anyway? I've
read his name on this list before, and actually met him on my
way up the quad at Stowe in February (I was taking a lesson and
my instructor him to me). What are the stories (and truths) about
To answer Marcia's questions, SkiVt-L is proud to present
The Buffalo Bill Story Archives
DISCLAIMER 1: I cannot reveal my sources. I claim not to have
written any of the following, nor do I even remember where I found
these stories. Names changed to protect the innocent, all of whom
will deny any knowledge of the following words.
DISCLAIMER 2: I am not now nor will I ever be Buffalo Bill,
nor do I speak for him or against him. I simply channel rumors
that have come across the SkiVt-L administration desk.
DISCLAIMER 3: If any of the following is true, then Buffalo Bill must be a totally fictitious character. Any resemblance to a living or dead Buffalo Bill is totally coincidental.
- Have a Buffalo Bill story for you "fans". Bob "needs" to be the last person on
the last chair on the last day of the year (he doesn't count night skiing).
One of the lift attendants and tele-"Julie" decided to play a joke on him.
They let him on the "last" chair. In the meantime "Julie" was behind the
lift attendant's booth. Knowing that Bob has jumped off the chair before, they
waited till he was too far up to jump & let "Julie" on the last chair. Bob
is FURIOUS! It was the talk of the New Year's Eve party I was at & "Kurt Black"
said he'd put it in the "Celebrities" column in the Stowe Reporter. Bob pushed his
way thru the lift line on Wednesday as "Julie" & I were ready to load. He
wanted to talk to "Julie" to let her know he didn't think it was funny & to
tell her he was on the "last official chair of the year." He told her that she
was trying to spoil it for him but didn't because she wasn't "following the
rules." She asked what rules & he said "My rules." By this time you KNOW my
tongue was really bleeding from the biting!!!! (while I'm wearing my employee
name tag!) "Julie" asked if he was angry because he lost to a tele skier or,
as she put it, "a girl." Bob just kept repeating that it didn't count. Reminds
me of the Christmas Eve at Foxfire when Bob was sitting alone at his table
reading the menu. The waitress picked up a glass of water from our table &
threw it at him. we looked -- His menu was on fire!!
- Someone saw him once at the Quad, putting his skis on in the
line. They noticed the bottoms and said there were huge gaps where
the bottoms were gouged out. The tails on top were really a mess,
either from the way he skis or people stepping on them to keep
him in check in the lines. Someone notice him coming down Liftline
one weekend and he seemed to almost be turning!!!! He has slowed
down quite a bit and he's been taking breaks in the bitter cold
because of the problems he has from so much frostbite. But he
still scares people when they hear him coming. "Bob alert"
is a cry to be taken seriously.
- "MABB" - that's Mothers against Buffalo Bill - Some
of the local moms had bumper stickers made. "Amy" is
not the only one in Stowe that thinks the guy is dangerous.
- BB used to like to be on the last chair on the last day and
he especially wanted to be on the last mountain double chair before
it was taken out. The lift attendants and patrol knew this, of
course. So, rumor has it, they had a plan. Patrol made snowballs
all day long at the top of the double/single. When BB wanted to
get on, the lift guys told him he had to wait , but they'd make
sure he got the last chair. The signal to the top was all the
empty chairs before BB came up. The guys at the top stopped the
chair just before he got to the top, and patrol pelted him with
snowballs. And BB's reaction, you ask. Well, true to BB ego, he
told everyone they did it because they like him!!!!!
- "Madge" got on the quad one warm Feb. day in 94 &
BB got on from the singles line, sans shirt. "Madge"
yelled OOOOOOOH!!!! Cover that uuuupp!!! I guess she wasn't impressed.
- A recent article in SKI magazine closes with something about
the author asking Bob -- if he had to -- would he choose a record
run number 47 or a pretty girl. Bob thought about it for several
long seconds, and replied, "I THINK I would choose the girl."
He wasn't too sure. "We" doubt he'll be faced with that
dilemma anytime soon.
- "Don" bumped into Boston at Action Outfitters. BB
told "Don" how much he loved the SKI article (surprise),
and when shop rat "Jim" mentioned that he hadn't heard
about it, Bob proudly whipped out a tattered copy for all to see
on a moment's notice.
- Buffalo Bill was seen back in November by "Tom" with
a woman and child in tow. "Tom" saw him stopped in the
middle of the trail, waiting for woman and child to catch up.
Buffalo Bill told "Tom" not to tell anyone he had actually
stopped in the middle of a trail.
- In December 1995, Buffalo Bill almost skied into "Mike"
at the Starr-Lookout intersection. "Mike" couldn't believe
Bob had skied Starr. Bob actually stopped for a fraction of a
second, looked at "Mike", grunted, and seemed as if
he couldn't believe someone was standing in his way. He looked
"Mike" in the eye long enough to register recognition
that he had seen "Mike" on the hill before and "Mike"
better not try such a wacky stunt as stand still again
A skivittler recently wrote:
THE TOP 7 REASONS WHY Buffalo Bill SHOULD SKI YAWGOO
(Yawgoo is a tiny ski hill in Rhode Island)
7 Much more convenient to Boston than far away Stowe
6 At Yawgoo, he'd be considered an expert skier
5 Can never reach dangerous speeds on narrow and flat Rhode Island
4 Meet new challenges, like: how many backwards runs in one day?
3 Certain of getting the absolute most vertical in the state
2 Achieve ski god status with locals by skiing over 100 runs in
1 Never, EVER have to turn.
Gee. Maybe some ski shop at Stowe could start up a "Send
Buffalo Bill to Yawgoo" collection. It's bound to be cheaper
The Buffalo Bill story archive established 2 Apr 1996. Last Update
February 10, 1997.
Send your Buffalo Bill stories to firstname.lastname@example.org